Vegetarian-ish

Ever since I was a teenager- we're talking many years ago- I identified myself as a vegetarian. It wasn't because I had an unabashed love for animals or became disgusted at the sight of raw chicken. I was healthy, thin and smart and I intended to stay that way. I saw swearing off meat as a way to be healthy. No meat=less carbs, right? Well not exactly. I went thru various stages including no meat, easing back in fish and chicken, then easing chicken back out. I could never give up dairy products. Oh delightfully pungent scent of Camembert- I will never forsake you! As I got older and cooked more I would prepare carnivorous dishes for friends or family and simply eat around the protein.
So a few weeks ago I went to visit my brother in Montana, "the land of the effortlessly cool" as he calls it. I've been to the trendy parts of California where sprouts are vogue and everyone is just getting back from a beach run. I've walked around South Beach and ogled the lithe bodies that subsist on skinny girl margaritas and nicotine. But I was unprepared for this Midwestern eating experience. The people are real. They genuinely want to get to know visitors and share what they have. And most exciting of all- everyone loved to eat. So as it turns out almost everyone hunts for their protein. There's no going to a grocery store and buying an anonymous, cellophane wrapped piece of cow. These people go out every year and hunt for game. In both households I was invited into, the folks had taken down an entire elk, dressed it into usable parts and put it in the family freezer. So when thinking about dinner tomorrow the cook of the house goes and pulls out that elk loin to smoke with juniper berries and rosemary. Now this presented quite a dilemma for me. I was graciously invited into people's homes that wanted to prepare a delicious, local meal for me. I'll be damned if I would insult them or insist on a "meat-free" dish.
And so I ended up eating fantastic elk sausage stuffed cabbage rolls. Lucky for me that meal ended with an amazing homemade apple pastry with caramel sauce. That dinner involved an exciting conversation about the many varieties of salt. We concluded with an improptu grinding of a coarse variety to get just the right grain for tasting.
Another delicious meal consisted of a vegetable and ground elk lasagna. I sat around that table with my family and friends aged 2 to 42 and scraped my plate clean. There was a killer local beer to go with that dinner. This experience provoked a fantastic conversation around religion for kids and what responsibility parents had to teach them.
All this exotic meat eating led me to question my own commitment to animal free meals. Why did I still abstain from the beast? I realized that I avoid most meat now because I don't trust where it comes from. I can't fathom the conditions the "products" are produced in at the factories. Not only do I believe that evil, unhealthy things are circulating in the food source in the way of bacteria and disease, but the bad energy that these poor creatures have been imbued with should not be passed on to humans at consumption. And so I found that eating an animal that had been killed in a humane manner, broken down at the source and brought back for a family to use for nourishment made a lot of sense. The hunter knew that this animal lived off the land. The mighty elk wasn't pumped full of chemicals to bulk up too quickly. Ultimately I respected this way of providing for one's family.
And now I'm back in Florida. It's back to smoked tofu stroganoff and tempeh reubens. I still can't bring myself to order a steak. Perhaps someday soon I'll pack my bags and move to the mountains. Then I'll buy a bow and arrow, hike up into the mountains and see if I have what it takes to be a real foodie. Until then, I'll just eat around it.